"Where the sun don't shine"

I had a miscarriage on April 27th.  Enter downward spiral of emotions and self-pity, I barely went through the motions for a month and a half.  Everything suffered: my marriage, my friendships, my furry 4-legged kids, the garden, the cleaning around the house, my fitness routine.  My self-pity (aka head stuck up where the sun doesn't shine) sucked the life out of everyone.  I gained about ten pounds and felt sorrier for myself.  Too much wine, too much junk, and not enough umph: you cannot out exercise a bad diet.

In an attempt to avoid sitting on the couch for hours last night, I wanted to walk down to the lake.  The weather gods did not approve, and I decided personal safety was probably better than fresh air and getting zapped by lightning.  So I went into the office, plugged into Beachbody and did some reading.  I also turned on the coach training and did crunches and push-ups while listening.  I rewrote my anorexia story and began to "retrain the brain" by planning more.  (I dug out my calendar and wrote my goals for the next day).

I woke up early, fed the "kids" (husband, dog, cat & chickens) and trooped over to my sister's to let her pups run for a bit.  I hit the treadmill, then opted to take a turn on the spin bike.  Three miles and 225 assorted crunches later, I headed home feeling like I had finally pulled my head out of my arse.  Too often we spend time worrying over what will come, despairing over what was and forget the gift of each moment where we actually are.  It's easy to go through the motions and post positive uplifting notes.  It's the letting go and seizing the present moment that somehow seems difficult.  Suddenly though, the sun will shine as the weight is lifted.  I pared it down - from one day at a time to one moment at a time.  Simple.  Effective. 

If you are burdened with something, reach out to someone.  Just vent and get some of the stress off of your shoulders.  Don't carry it alone.  Give it time, and you will find a way to let go - it does not mean forgetting, just accepting what is and moving forward.  Acknowledge the issue.  Ask yourself if you can change it.  No?  Let go and understand that it is out of your hands.  Breathe.  One moment at a time.